working to be a 'YES' mom!!

i stumbled on this story from someone's blog and it made me think....am i a 'yes' mom?
 most days, not so much.  that is one thing that i struggle with. i really WANT to be a mom that let's her kids, well, be kids. MOST of the time, my reasons for saying NO are purely selfish.
i'm working on this.
i would LOVE to hear your stories.
do you consider yourself a 'yes' mom?
if not, why?
give me your stories!!



Last week my boys ran inside and said, "Mom, mom...it's so hot outside! Can we see if it's hot enough to cook an egg on the sidewalk?"

The practical side of me started to say no, but then I caught myself. What would it hurt for them to try it? Why couldn't I say yes? Is it "wasting" an egg, or simply using it for a different, but just as valuable, purpose?

After that quick argument in my head, I finally said, "Sure. If you want to try it, go ahead! Just make sure you wash off the sidewalk when you're done." They got an egg from the refrigerator and ran out of the house to try their science experiment.

Over 24 years of mothering, I've finally learned how to be a "yes" mom more than a "no" mom. It wasn't an easy transition...but it was an important one. For years my interactions with my kids looked more like this:

"No, you can't fingerpaint." (It will make too much of a mess.)



"No, you can't bake cookies today." (I just mopped the kitchen floor!)



"No, you can't have a friend over today." (I don't want to go anywhere today and I'd have to go get them.)



"No, you can't play in the sprinklers." (I'm not in the mood for wet swimsuits, towels, and grass tracked in the house.)



"No, you can't go out and play in the snow." (I don't want to deal with the snowsuits, boots, gloves, scarves, and hassle of it all.)


Over time, however, I started paying attention to the "no's" and my reasoning behind them. It usually had something to do with my selfish reasons. I didn't want to deal with a mess. I didn't want to be inconvenienced. I didn't want to have more work to do.

That's not fun to admit, but it was true. My selfishness was robbing my kids of some of the joy of just being kids!

I remember one afternoon many years ago when a couple of the kids asked, "Can we blow bubbles in the house? I initially said no because bubbles have always been an outside activity. But then I thought about my answer. Why couldn't they blow bubbles in the house? We even have the bubble cups that don't spill! Why do I always say no so quickly? Finally, I called my kids back into the kitchen and said, "Yes, you can blow bubbles in the house. Have a blast."

And they did.

And I started being more of a "yes" mom, than a "no" mom that day.

Now I'm not talking here about permissive parenting. I'm not talking about the times that we need to say no because our kids really do need us to set boundaries. I'm talking about the times that I say no out of selfishness, or default, or habit.

please, SHARE YOUR STORIES!!!

thankful~day 3

are you doing it? come on, are you WITH me? did you even read about my 'challenge'? if not...read it people.
you need to be in the know.
if you aren't the next 27 days on my blog page will mean nothing to you. if you are in the 'know'...
here you go...my day three.

today i am thankful for my 'wednesday morning girls'.
every week, we get together to study God's word, chat much and share our lives with each other.
some weeks we chit chat about nothing. some weeks we do a lot of sharing. some weeks we do a little crying.
every week, i feel that God is honored, i hope He is, by the way we are seeking to KNOW him better.
i love these girls because i know that each and every one of them would have my back, no matter what.
i know that i can count on them to be prayer warriors for me.
i am humbled that i call each and every one of them friends.
some wednesday mornings, Satan works overtime to keep me from going. 'i'm too tired. i have shopping to do. i need to clean my house, blah, blah, blah'. but each week, i leave there feeling blessed!
truly filled up.
in fact, my cup runs over.
so today, i am SO grateful for my girls. my sweet, wonderful girls.

sorry, i totally cut off a few peoples heads. (sorry, kath and shona!) oh well, it was an old picture anyways. plus, we have some new members. i'll work on getting a new, uncropped one.

our busy week....

 grandma likkel just bought an Erector set for the boys at a garage sale. i LOVED what my baby came up with. a true masterpiece!

 ~J and M~

maxwell's science project. we could have used ANYTHING to build a 'cell' but my dear boy choose cake. if you know max, this doesn't surprise you. :) great job buddy....i think it's a SURE A+!

while i don't particularly ADORE our cat, i have to say, whenever she kills (and disassembles) mice, i always give her an extra pat on the head. one time i even went and got her a fresh piece of ham out of the fridge. just so she knows that dead mice are ALWAYS better than alive ones. (notice the head on the right hand side?) good job, Joe. you've done well.  now go do some more killing instead of sleeping your life away!

my hub LOVES a clean, shiny vehicle!

 carving the gourds.

 really now, could they BE any cuter? i think not.

 heading out to begin the 'teeth rooting process'.

 my buddy, alex dale.

 hailey sue, i love you.

 the gang heading out. we spent the first part of Saturday night in my friend, kathy's subdivision. since they live in town, my kids always hit the 'motherload' of candy.

 sambo and his buddy, cameron insisted on breaking away from the crowd. (i let him) could it be that my baby doesn't actually NEED me to supervise him ALL. THE. TIME?? awww. say it isn't so.

 TEAM LIKKEL

we were invited, for the second half of our night out to attend another party at the Turners. it was a wonderful time of getting to hang out with old friends and even make a few new ones. the boys had such a GREAT time. oh, we did too!

max is bobbin'.

 J & daddy watching the Seahawks get spanked on Sunday afternoon.

 please get down from the tree.

 no, really, GET DOWN.

 the boys have come up with a new game. they huck (yes, ed, it's a real word!) the football toward the peak of the house and then attempt to catch it.

this is a FULL-contact game. someone usually gets hurt. but hey, they're outside running off steam. better outside, than in.

 election day. interesting picture, huh? didn't even realize what it said when i took the picture. but i have to say, i agree.

i'm 100% Republican and i'm NOT afraid to admit it. :)

 my other limb.

 one of my favorite times of the day. what i'll hear, 15 seconds after  taking this picture is:

"i'm starving!! what's to eat!"

it's the same thing....every. single. day.

 love u babe.

 my mom just found this little gem in her storage. this will mean NOTHING unless you grew up in my home OR spent a lot of time there. when i sent my sis a picture of it this week, she cried. isnt' that funny how just a little thing can bring back such incredible memories!?  thanks mom for letting it grace my counter. sister, i'll share it will you....next year, it can grace yours.

 since jack & sam were playing at the Veenings for the afternoon, maxwell got to go pick apples with my dad and i. we didn't really NEED anymore apples but the dutch in my dad & i could NOT let them just hang there at .33 a pound! really, i'd rather have them rot in my garage than know i let a good deal go. oh, wait, that isn't really a good deal then, is it?

 isn't this precious??!

 yes, this was my hubs doing. he actually ORGANIZED the kid's candy. i'm not really sure what to make of this.

i ended up giving them permission to eat every last piece on Sunday. "what the heck? you'll probably get sick (they didn't!) but go ahead and eat it ALL in one day. be done. be done asking me ALL day if you can have just ONE more LITTLE piece." you would've thought they won the lottery.

all the candy was gone within minutes of my giving permission to do so.

(i should have hid some of those snickers bars cuz now i have NOTHING!)

boo.

 this is my latest wall word. my friend, mel came and helped me put it on canvas since we all know, i'll change my paint color long before i get sick of the saying. you must read the words. it's a sweet, sweet saying! a great eBay find!

 jack and Beppe helping me peel all those CHEAP apples. the ones that they're peeling here are the ones that my mom got for  free this past weekend! (my mom is really dutch too!) you'll all appreciate it when you're eating FRESH applesauce and apple crisp at my house in the middle of January!

a bountiful harvest! 

graditute

so, i've been blog surfing.
i do that A.LOT.
since i have done So much blog-stalking over the past week, i forgot where i saw this but i thought this was a GREAT idea. and a GREAT challenge! i know i'm a few days late but jump on in with me, would you?

here's what you do.
get yourself a little notepad.
grab your camera. 
write down and snap pictures of ALL the things that you are grateful for.
it's Thanksgiving month and what better time of the year than this to remember and JOURNAL what you are most thankful for!
come on, i dare you. just try it for 30 days. i'm not promising, but i can almost bet that you'll end this month with a whole new perspective.
for me personally, days can go by without me even thinking of blessings in my life. sure, i know i'm blessed but how often do i look, REALLY look at the world around and THANK God for my blessings. SPECIFIC blessings.
i'm up for the challenge.
hoping you'll join me.
i've even got a grand idea to have a 'guest' on my blog. at the end of  November, email me your list and i'll post it here!
DO it....you'll be GRATEFUL that you did!